Monday, August 25, 2014

Fans, Supporters, Opposers

Fans. More than spectators, more than cheers and jeers. Men and women, young girls and boys, start off as people in the crowd and soon grow to be an integral piece of the drama that is a soccer game. The suspense is heightened by the gasps of thousands in unison. The judgements by the referee are speculated and adversed through chatter and boos. Forty-five minutes at a time. Each minute filled with an emotion. Whether that be a disappointment or an intoxicating moment of joy, the experience and interaction between fans and the actions on the field are one and the same.

As an athlete I am a fan of many other sports merely because I respect their handwork and dedication. But there are a few players and teams in the world that I have huge adoration for.

I remember when I was around 19 I went to Italy and went to see my childhood team Ac Milan play in the San Siro. For me it was a dream come true. I had magazine clippings of Paolo Maldini hanging in my room. I used to yell the name Dida when I made a save. Me and my friends would yell Insaghi when we scored and celebrated in his honor.

For me to be a fan is the same as being a player. During the moments of the game everyone is involved in the same task, to win and win well. All surrounding blur together and you forget where you are. You begin to think your on the field playing and where you will pass the ball next. Its sort of like playing the video game FIFA. Its an experience that is unlike any other and can be an addiction in its own way.

As a goalkeeper the fans impact me profoundly. I spend a lot of my time alone in the back, most of the time talking to myself to stay focused. But when the fans are yelling my name in support and encouragement I no longer need to find ways to stay focused. They provide the musical background to my mini drama. They heighten my sense of awareness and as well boost my confidence for what will happen next.

The opposing fans boos and jeers invoke even more feelings within. They enthuse me to prove them wrong with their cries of misery and hatred. The louder their jeers the more ramped up I feel to go into the moment of battle with arrogance and distaste for the enemy and their entourage.

Like in a tv show or movie, when the uplifting music gets louder you just know that whatever happens next will be good.

J. B. Priestley
To say that these men paid their shillings to watch twenty-two hirelings kick a ball is merely to say that a violin is wood and catgut, that Hamlet is so much paper and ink.

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Luck, Hardwork, Prayer.

The 3 things every player needs to do well I soccer is Luck, Hardwork, and Prayer. There are 265 million registered soccer players in the world and not nearly enough teams to fill. Many players make the cut and break in at an early age and their life is only to maintain their skills and stay in form. Then there are many players who due to location of birth, financial difficulties, politics, or for many other reasons are left grasping at smaller chances and or any situation in order to get another year to play the sport they love.

For myself I have always came so close to getting where I want to be that it leaves a taste and desire in my gut that will only be quenched once I attain my goal. Its like being given a really nice thing, like being allowed to fly first class on a top airline or given a ferrari to drive for one day. Once that thing has left your hands you are left with a feeling that will do anything possible and spend as much time of your life working to gain that thing back.

I remember being in Leverkussen academy in Germany at the age of 14 and my training had been going really well. I was getting strong feedback from the coaches and staff, and the man that was taking care of me and housing me said he looked forward to me living there and getting to know me. The next thing that happened was Mark the the man who got me there called me and said pack up, I was going to Austria Vienna. I didn't think much about it being a kid, I was just taking whatever came my way and found it all very exciting. I ended up returning after some time and not being able to stay in Europe, the place I had fallen deeply in love with.

Years later I spoke to Mark on the phone and he said, “Leverkussen was very keen to keep you, we should've stayed longer the timing and planning was a mess”. As you can imagine my mind flashed into a day dream of what my life would've turned out to be had that had worked out. But thats the thing, In this business you cant have regrets because these things happen almost every week. Timing will sometimes work in your favor, sometimes it will work strongly against you. This is where prayer comes in for me as I am a strong believer in faith and more importantly, Karma.

My first pro contract I was in Puerto Rico with Bayamon Fc. Our team had been doing well and had advanced to the playoffs and It was set to be the semi finals. Just that week the coach told me our parent team the Islanders were sending down their backup goalkeeper to play the next few games, even though I had played the last 10 and had had some brilliant moments. Justin Myers who I later became good friends with played the first semi final and had done well. The following weekend I knew I would not play and me and the other reserve players decided to play video games all night till early morning. I was awoke early the next morning by a missed call from the coach. “Devala your playing today, Justin’s paperwork didn't go through so hes out.” With my heart pounding and the weight of the whole teams success or failure on my shoulders, I went out and played. Played well at that.

We went on to play the final and won the league, a huge moment in my early career. I was able to use the platform for god and to inspire others to do the same.

Long story short, this moment taught me two vital lessons. Timing and Karma can take a huge U-turn sometimes and hit you when your not ready, so always be ready and take whatever comes your way with grace; and confidence that you are prepared.

“Luck is not chance-
It’s Toil-
Fortune’s expensive smile
Is earned-“
— Emily Dickinson

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Tuesday, August 05, 2014

No effort without error

I was recently in conversation with a player for the Ottawa Redblacks, Carleton Mitchell. We discussed instability, an issue that is commonly faced by professional athletes. He has recently suffered from a concussion keeping him out of the starting lineup for several weeks and preventing him from playing the sport he loves; unfortunately this is not uncommon. One day you will be at top performance, mentally and physically strong and the next day you could be injured, sidelined, or out of a contract entirely. It was great to speak to someone in a similar situation and gain perspective. It is difficult to be sidelined because ultimately I want to see my team succeed and I want to help them do that.

Since I began playing soccer I have played in several European countries as well as across Asia and North America. In my diverse experience I have dealt with opposition in every form. Injury, missed opportunities, bad timing, and inexperience have all contributed to my unique experience. I have been dropped from the roster, been without contract questioning my future, and faced irreconcilable contract negotiations. Throughout all these obstacles I have struggled with my choice in profession, questioning my abilities as well as the decisions that lead me to each bump in the road.

I recently read a book called Graduation by Richard Lee, a goalkeeper who played in England for many years and struggled with the ups and downs of his position. He goes as far as to say he developed serious mental issues from the sport and how often he even hated or feared playing a game.

What I learned from Richards plight as well as my personal experiences is this:

In soccer and in life, no matter how big of a setback hits you there is always an amazing opportunity to bounce back and reinvent oneself. It can be such a strong emotional feeling to be in a situation where you are doubted or criticized. Most of the time it allows you the freedom to work harder than usual with the no-holds-barred attitude that you’ve got nothing to lose, but everything to gain. I find those situations the best for my personal development.

I think complacency can kill a persons identity, but constant self development will always build courage and fulfillment.

Here is a quote that I have always adored and I read it before every game to remind myself that life is bigger than just todays efforts.

“Its not the critic that counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strive valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. “

-Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, August 25, 2014

Fans, Supporters, Opposers

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Luck, Hardwork, Prayer.

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Tuesday, August 05, 2014

No effort without error

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