"I am strong because I've been weak, I am fearless because I've been afraid, I am wise because I've been foolish."
Pattaya Thailand, 2009. I was a new signee for Pattaya United F.C, a top team competing in the Thai Premier League. I was second choice to a Thai national team selected goalie and impatiently awaiting my premier game. I envisioned it as a game I would start from the beginning, walk out from the tunnel, and go out and have a solid 90 minutes. It wasn't the case.
It was a home game vs Police United, a huge rivalry for Pattaya and we were up 1-0. Our goalie went down with an injury just before halftime and I was ordered to warm up. The crowd of 10-20 thousand people cheered when I entered the field and I finished off the half with some big saves and good moments. The second half began. I played brilliant until the 80th minute, when a ball was played back to me slowly. With one striker approaching me quickly, I nonchalantly did a nice move to go around him and I felt great, until another striker stripped the ball off me from behind and went in for the tying goal. My debut game had my biggest career mistake ever.
My mistake gave me lots to think about. Did I just end my career as it started? Or did I learn one of the toughest lessons of all? Since I was a kid I had a natural ability to not be fearful. I have always loved to try new things as sort of a dare to myself. I never minded failing as long as I felt that I tried and tried my best.
Failure to learn, is learning to fail.
No on is perfect. The people who act or say they are perfect are fools. The way a gemologist knows a real stone from a fake is easy. Fake stones are perfect, real gems are flawed. And I know this in debt from my research when buying my wife’s engagement ring.
After a failure follows such an adventure. Once you let go of the failure you begin to rebuild stronger and more resilient. When you lift weights you have to literally tear your muscles first in order for them to rebuild and then eventually, grow bigger. But some people prefer not to be bigger, not to be better, and not to take risks. These people are missing out on a great feeling.
Last december I was traveling with my wife to North India near the himalayas. I had been in sort of a rut and feeling a lack of excitement and thrill. We ventured high in the mountains to a city called Gantok, about 11,000 feet above sea level. And since I was a kid I have always had a case of vertigo, so any heights make me dizzy and give me a feeling of fear and un settled. I hated this feeling. I saw some people paragliding and decided it was the right time to overcome this fear once and for all. I went up to 12,000 ft to the edge of a cliff, strapped to the instructor, he then said “Ok, just run and jump off.” It was the craziest thing I had heard, but once I did it I felt invigorated. We flew 30 miles an hour for a 1,500 drop. My fear of heights was eliminated. And in fact, when I landed the first thing I said to my wife was, “I am now an adrenaline junky, lets do sky-diving and free base jumping next”. She wasn't too fond of these ideas.
My advice, go forth and make huge mistakes. Your lack of fear will turn into your lack of hesitation on a soccer field, or in any work situation where you need to be bold and want to excel beyond the average person.
****Read this book. It will help any athlete, or any person trying to become stronger mentally.